Snowed In

In case you hadn’t guessed, I found my camera! It turns out I left it in Stephanie’s car after the reading at The Rubber Rose… which was awesome, by the way. It was a sort of book release party for The IHOP Papers, a novel by Ali Liebegott. I think it was part of some kind of LGBT reading series they have there. Attached to the “sexuality boutique”, The Rubber Rose has this community space where a lot of performance art and gallery showings happen, and it was packed with Ali’s friends and appreciators. People from many different parts of her life (students, partners, publishers) all read from her book, and it was amazing to see someone accomplishing something so cool with such great support from her community. It was obvious Ali had given a lot to those people and that they’d given back.

So. Valentine’s Day.

I wasn’t even really thinking about Valentine’s Day until I stumbled out of the lab at about noon and realized that campus was awash with dapper young men with bouquets of roses and sorority sisters dressed up in tiny little matching pink polka-dotted dresses.

And I felt a twinge of sadness that I would have no Valentine this year, that I would probably not even get a Valentine’s Day card or phone call. It was a depressing thought. But then I thought, why do I deserve a valentine? I hadn’t given any, why should anyone give one to me? I hadn’t asked anyone to be my valentine, why would I expect to be in any other position?

So, I tore down some faded red flyers that were posted, ran back to the lab, found a pair of scissors and made some valentines for my lab mates and other loved ones. It’s awesome to get your creativity on, it’s awesome to salvage materials from the trash, and it’s awesomer to turn minor depression into cause for adventure.

I left them on keyboards and delivered them in person, and it was really nice to see people smile. Brynn gave me a big hug. I still didn’t receive any valetines, but I felt pretty good about my love Karma.

My Valentine’s evening was to be a quiet night at home and at the laundromat. I cooked up some Rapini, which is a really intensely flavored leafy green, sometimes known as Broccoli Rabe. It comes in our food box, and I’ve been stir-frying it, but this recipe came right from our farmer. She said to sautee it in olive oil with garlic and raisins and then squeeze lemon juice over it. Basically, you put it in with a bunch of other super-intense flavors and they miraculously all stand up to each other. It was delicious.

I added cashews for some extra protein, but the cashew flavor, which is normally pretty detectable, was totally dominated by the other flavors. They provided a nice crunch though.

That said, by the time I had eaten dinner and sat in the laundromat until 9:30pm, I was again thoroughly depressed that no one was thinking of me this Valentine’s Day and I had no one to think of. My mind wandered to all of my friends out there spending the evening with a lover or a friend. I trudged home with my folded laundry feeling sorry for myself. At the apartment I joked a little about it with Kerry and Gina, but then they left and I was alone in the apartment again.

I peeked my head out the window and saw that my neighbor Carrie had her light on and her door open, so I poured a glass of wine and went down to say hello. She could totally see in my eyes that I was feeling down, and she immediately said we should get a drink at the Tractor Room.

To make a long story short, it was just the nicest possible end to the day. Carrie and I had a great chat about all kinds of stuff… romance, the fact that she prefers tropical beaches and prefer New England lakes, self-empowerment, the crazy tasty drinks we were being served… I don’t know, it was just a great conversation.

It’s funny how we find things in unexpected places. I think of Carrie as an awesome neighbor more than a best friend, but this is the second time she’s just come along at the perfect time and picked me up a bit.

And that’s what friendship is. That’s what love is. Stepping outside of your own day-to-day concerns, looking into someone’s soul, and reaching a hand out to them.

And it’s a nice feeling.